Things I Can't Stand

"Sampsonite24-Earth's Least Likeliest Hero" (sampsonite24) 04/05/2015 at 02:49 • Filed to: None

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Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > Sampsonite24-Earth's Least Likeliest Hero 04/05/2015 at 02:58

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God I hate hate hate hate those dear this things. Even more pathetic when you see a guy or gal with only one half of the set. I'M SINGLE I'M LONELY AND I LIKE COUNTRY.

Birddog > Sampsonite24-Earth's Least Likeliest Hero 04/05/2015 at 04:19

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I'm in my 40s and have yet to meet a "real" Country girl.

They's all a bit fake brother!

XJDano > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 04/05/2015 at 07:41

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Depending on the meaning.

Those "1/2" decals are actually a company logo. Browning.

I got my wife one for her car, after she harvested her first deer, with a Browning BAR.

Although I do feel a bit odd when I drive it alone.

But I do agree the double deer, heart things are stupid. Unless there is one with 2 bucks, I'd be ok with that.

TopSirloin > Sampsonite24-Earth's Least Likeliest Hero 04/05/2015 at 08:09

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I think I'd prefer a fake country girl over a real country girl, who dips and can kill and dress a hog 10 minutes flat. I think a real country girl may actually be rather appalling. I do agree, the fake ones are pretty obnoxious, too.

JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder! > Sampsonite24-Earth's Least Likeliest Hero 04/05/2015 at 08:16

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oh my god that's 90% of my Florida high school

Sampsonite24-Earth's Least Likeliest Hero > TopSirloin 04/05/2015 at 08:23

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Hell where I come from the fake country girls dipped too

yamahog > Sampsonite24-Earth's Least Likeliest Hero 04/05/2015 at 08:28

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Lol, calling anyone "real" or "fake" based on what they wear is so high school it hurts. Until you get to college and you can totally tell when someone's not Greek, and that's still pretty juvenile.

PS9 > yamahog 04/05/2015 at 08:33

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That sounds like something a fake geek girl would say...hmm...

Your boy, BJR > JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder! 04/05/2015 at 08:38

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Pretty sure it's more insufferable in NJ. Just saying. at least in Florida the accent is real.

yamahog > PS9 04/05/2015 at 08:38

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Meh, I've gotten "not a REAL engineer" type shit for wearing light makeup and dresses in an office setting... But gods forbid you *don't* wear makeup, then you're a tired/sick looking slob. #overit

PS9 > yamahog 04/05/2015 at 08:42

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Wow, really? That's pretty gross/sad. I though that was the kind of thing only teenagers on the internet did, not college educated adults with careers...

WesBarton89 - The Way to Santa Fe > Sampsonite24-Earth's Least Likeliest Hero 04/05/2015 at 08:46

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I used to date a girl who was a "real country girl". Actually, she was pure redneck. She lived in a trailer, smoked Marlboro reds, drank like a fish, went fishing and hunting, loved country music, and did a lot of cooking. She was also a psycho hose beast. Crazy psycho bitch.

JR1 > Your boy, BJR 04/05/2015 at 08:47

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People try to be country in NJ? That's odd

Sampsonite24-Earth's Least Likeliest Hero > yamahog 04/05/2015 at 08:50

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It's not just what they wear. It's their obnoxious "look at me I'm so country" attitude. Then they start whining the second their boots get dirty

yamahog > PS9 04/05/2015 at 08:51

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Oh yes indeed, infuriatingly, and not just in engineering. The "fake geek girl" thing is hilarious in its own right too... like aren't the people complaining about them the same type of people who wonder why girls don't go for nice guys like them? Lol

holdenbacktears > WesBarton89 - The Way to Santa Fe 04/05/2015 at 09:09

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Now there's nothing wrong with smoking marlboro reds and drinking like a fish. That confederate lingerie/bikini is really doing it for me too. I think I need to call my parents

Your boy, BJR > JR1 04/05/2015 at 09:10

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JR1 > Your boy, BJR 04/05/2015 at 09:16

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They obviously skipped the civil war during history class

Your boy, BJR > JR1 04/05/2015 at 09:28

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it was a girl jeep too.

"Oh wouldn't having a man whose teeth are bound to rot out due to dip, treats me like a second class citizen, and knows how to skin stuff be LOVELY?"

PS9 > WesBarton89 - The Way to Santa Fe 04/05/2015 at 09:30

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"Psycho hose beast"?

JR1 > Your boy, BJR 04/05/2015 at 09:31

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I can skin a deer but I never understood how half by buddies dipped. As shit like a confederate flag is stupid for multiple reasons.

TheBloody, Oppositelock lives on in our shitposts. > JR1 04/05/2015 at 09:40

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What you have there is a "Piney", they're the inbred citizens who inhabit the pine barrens of NJ. Also fun fact, part of NJ is below the Mason Dixon line.

Mike > Sampsonite24-Earth's Least Likeliest Hero 04/05/2015 at 09:46

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For some totally inexplicable reason, the Fake Country Girl often seems to (d)evolve into the Single, White, and Pregnant, at least around my area.

Note: the Single, White, and Pregnant Starter Pack may come with an addiction to heroin if you live in Southeast Michigan.

j250ex > WesBarton89 - The Way to Santa Fe 04/05/2015 at 10:18

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smoking is fine. i can forgive that. knew a girl who dipped longcut snuff. no thank you

Alfalfa Romeo > Sampsonite24-Earth's Least Likeliest Hero 04/05/2015 at 10:26

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In all fairness, I dated a real "country girl" (raised on farm, loved trucks, guns, hunting, etc) who would wear some of these things.

yamahog > PS9 04/05/2015 at 10:41

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Apparently a thing?

PS9 > yamahog 04/05/2015 at 10:43

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That phrase makes me think of this.

Frank Grimes > Sampsonite24-Earth's Least Likeliest Hero 04/05/2015 at 11:02

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personally I wouldnt touch a girl who wore cowboy boots with a 10 ft klown pole. and dont know why one would want to fake it all the country folk ive met have been absolute fiends. no matter how country they be for some reason need to overdo it 50 % to the point it seems like cariciture.

scoob > Sampsonite24-Earth's Least Likeliest Hero 04/05/2015 at 12:02

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There was a girl in one of my classes who lived in either Long Island (east of NYC) or Westchester (immediately north of NYC) and she always wore that hat and talked about how she went mudding in her truck with a stick.

I still don't believe her.

Sampsonite24-Earth's Least Likeliest Hero > scoob 04/05/2015 at 12:17

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I've actually seen an instagrams page called long island rednecks, I'm like you couldn't be more wrong

Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies > Your boy, BJR 04/05/2015 at 12:38

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For the most part there is no accent in any of the populated areas. It's more of a New York/Michigan mix.

The ones that have one, usually live way out in the sticks.

Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies > Sampsonite24-Earth's Least Likeliest Hero 04/05/2015 at 12:42

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You're forgetting the "FAITH" tattoo, that "separates" them more from the lesser hard core Christians at the social gathering that they think is a church. Or any tattoo that might convey their Christianity.

JR1 > TheBloody, Oppositelock lives on in our shitposts. 04/05/2015 at 19:26

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Really? I didn't know that!

thebigbossyboss > Mike 04/10/2015 at 10:14

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Lol. My girl has two of these and I have the third (car). Thank god there is no dunkin donuts in canada!